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  • Writer's pictureRyan Luby

Getting started..

Updated: Jun 19, 2018

I have been putting off starting a blog for a good 3-4 years now at this point. Let me just acknowledge that again.. For three years, I chose to not do something that really has no downside. No negative consequences no matter what. But still I convinced myself repeatedly, not to do something I wanted to.

(Does this sound familiar? Is there something you are avoiding doing, that you truly want to do? Are you making up great excuses to not take action just so you can stay comfortable and not take risks?)

But today is officially my first ever public post. I have wanted to write in some way for a long time and I always rationalized an endless list of reasons why not to do it.

Here is a sample of some of my limiting beliefs on why I shouldn’t write:

  • If I write I’m selfish. Nothing could be more selfish than to share my thoughts or ideas publicly, pretending my words should ever be heard.

  • I’m not an expert, or even good at anything. Only people with true skill and mastery should be able to write or speak publicly. I’m an amateur in every way.

  • When you speak, you aren’t listening. I believe strongly in listening and learning, but I foolishly took it to an extreme trying to rarely speak because I only wanted to learn. And again I felt selfish speaking in general, never mind writing publicly.

  • I’m stupid, what do I have to say or teach. I want to help people, but always felt I wasn’t smart enough to help. So why waste my time trying. Just let smart people and teachers help others.

  • I have poor grammar. I don’t even know how to use punctuation properly or hardly spell, how could anyone follow what I’m saying.

  • I’m weird. I’m too weird. People are going to be so confused at how weird I am they won’t even see what I’m saying anyway.

  • I’m not original. Everything I know or would say is just information from others so why would I talk anyway. I don’t have any original thoughts or ideas.

It goes on.. and on. And I could keep adding to that list everyday If I wanted to. I don’t. Over a year ago I was feeling a little confident and even set-up a blog. I finally thought, why not? So I researched how to start, followed all the steps, bought my domain, paid for a host site, downloaded the applications, designed a website, spent over 5 hours and $350 to get things ready for my blog… As I said, that was over a year ago.

Then I started listening to my limiting beliefs again, and I never wrote one word.

Long story long, I like to learn. And I had heard of a great blog post called “Regrets of the Dying” by Bronnie Ware. I remember reading that original post and feeling the impact it made on me. It certainly inspired me in many ways and encouraged me to re-evaluate a lot about what I was doing and how I was living. But like any great book, or information in general, you can read or hear it several times at several different points in your life and take away something different each time. At that point in my life connecting the article to writing or blogging never even crossed my mind. But when I heard of that post the first time, I also heard that Bronnie turned this post into a book and I immediately saved it in my amazon wishlist. About a month ago I was reviewing that list when I came across her book and dug into the reviews a bit to see if I wanted to buy it still. Turns out.. the book didn’t live up to the expectation based on the reviews I was reading lol so I decided not to buy it and deleted it from my list. But it did remind me again of just how great that blog post was so I went back to find it and save it. Before I eventually saved it, I read it again. And this time I was instantly reminded of how crazy I was for putting off writing for even a day. Never mind 3+ years of my life.

So what’s the point, what am I writing for, what will I talk about, why?

I feel my purpose in life is to teach others to live a better quality life. It’s that simple for me. I used to over-specify and stress that it needed to be about helping through specific means, and in certain focuses but I was wrong. There is nothing more important to me than helping others experience a better life, and since I am obsessed with learning to do so myself I figured why not write a little. I may not know specifically how I can help or who I can help but maybe if I just write in general someone will be able to find value in what I say. If at the end of the day even one person in this entire world reads something I write, and it somehow helps them live a better life, it was all worth it. No matter how simple or trivial that help is to that one person, that makes this a success for me.

I promise posts will not all be this serious or long, some will be, and some will be more serious and even longer, but some will be jokes, or quotes, or funny experiences or a few words. Some posts will be about basically nothing. I’m not expert. So I have nothing to specialize in writing about. I will write about what I am thinking, reading, practicing, observing and I will always provide additional resources from people much smarter than me who’s work encouraged me in each area so you can see where I got things from, and dig more into any topic you want. I will post every Monday and Friday a.m. I will also send out a weekly newsletter with some more specific information, tips, resources etc.

And finally, why is this named grow. I will certainly go into great detail in another post, but it’s because of the one thing that truly changed my entire life. The Growth mindset. Again I will get into detail at another time but it’s pretty simple.. If you just develop your belief about your own potential being limitless.. you grow. This is not only my belief, it has been studied, scientifically proven, and measured through research. Doesn’t mean you can do anything, but if you truly believe you can, you grow, your brain grows. You end up being able to do far more than you ever imagined.

And among many other things.. I believe if you’re not growing, you’re dying.

So we’re gunna grow.

Learn more on this:

Blog: Bronnie Ware - Regrets of the Dying

Video: Growth mindset - Ted Talk

Video: Neil Gaiman - Commencement speech “Make Good Art”

Book: The War of Art - Steven Pressfield

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